30 Reprimands + $500 Fine
"Spending the night with a person of the opposite sex "
I guess the gays are ok then 
This can't be real, can it?
It is people such as these that will bring about the end of society as we know it. Think religious freak hell...
I tell you, tis coming. (March 07, opens in theaters everywhere)
NO
30 Reprimands + $500 Fine
Immorality
Hahaha...
"Brokeback Baptists"
Coming soon to a theatre near you.
"Brokeback Baptists"
Submitted - Slogan Worthy
Approved. Tis funny.
They forgot:
30 reprimands + $500 fine
Understanding that the world is not flat.
Understanding that the world is more than 5000 years old.
Understanding that mutations occure.
that is the funniest thing i heard/saw all day!
I guess Jesus is rotting in hell for not only being WITH drinkers and drinking alcohol himself, but also magically creating alcohol.
OH mah lawd! Hesus Christoff actually made WINE! Damn him to hell I say DAMN HIM TO HELL!
[EDiT]
Isn't part of the sacrement drinking wine, the 'blood of jesus'....OOPS.
[Comment was edited by wit on January 19, 2006 at 08:42:24 PM]
Don't worry, due to transubstantiation the wine literally turns into blood and the bread into flesh. Ritualistic cannibalism is cool with Jerry F!
and I thought blood was thicker than wine...
Unfortunately, it promotes rust, so hose it out of the treads as soon as you can.
[Comment was edited by MacThulhu on January 19, 2006 at 09:35:28 PM]
not as long as you get sufficient fatty greasy fodder.
Standard of Dress for MEN
Hair and clothing styles related to a counterculture (as determined by the Deans' Review Committee) are not acceptable. Hair should be cut in such a way that it will not come over the ears, collar or eyebrows at any time.
That was like the catholic high school I attended. Hair couldn't touch the collar of the shirt, and no facial hair was allowed at all.
This is Jerry Falwell's school. There is no way in hell that ANY rational person would even consider attending or sending their kid to this school; but then again, I've never met a religious fundie who was rational.
On the plus side for the religious bigots, they hate blacks too.
I dunno, they do have a pretty good division II football program.
I'd be kicking your ass on the field too if I had to put up with that every day
Change your mind...Build your Faith
This place is a threat to the fabric of America. I am calling on the President to declare an immediate invasion and liberation of these students.
instead of dropping leaflets like we did in Nam maybe we could just drop rubbers!
I think a battalion of nymphomaniacs in their uniforms may be all that can save those poor kids, they're obviously too repressed to understand that the rubbers are for premarital sexual gratification.
SHAMELESS HUSSIES TO THE RESCUE!!!!!
If your sending the hussy squad there where do I register for school!
You're going to have to use your doublespeak to convince him...this is the kind of fundie place he likes to promote.
"Wow, what neat balloons!" :)
The rules mirror those of the one world religion. Those that attend this school will have little difficulty in the conversion. Others may or may not succeed in the conversion. But, you will make or you will not. There is no in between. Many stones have been gathered for the failures.
Yeah, don't attend, unless you want your future employers to know you're a moral person with character.
I'd love to work for a neo-con uber-right wing fundie company...they're LOADS of fun.
Or, oh, I don't know, stuck in the Dark Ages maybe?
Let's see, should I hire someone with the willpower and fortitude to make it through that school or should I hire the pot-smoking porn-addicted moonbat losers who make fun of those can do something they couldn't possibly do?
Liberty University alumni aren't moral, but they are characters.
On that line of thinking, 4 years of being a sub in a SMBD dungeon would give you the same results.
But the sub probably wouldn't believe me if I told him that dinosaurs didn't exist, we all come from 2 people, and a magic faery made the universe and everything that will ever be in it appear at the touch of his magic wand.
If hell exists, we're all going, including anyone that goes to Liberty University, cus as Rowan Atkinson said..."Sorry, the Jews were right..."
As a Christian who went a top 5 liberal arts school (Oberlin College), I must disagree w/ you and LAUGH at this ludicrous system. Aren't Christians supposed to exhibit self control out of love for God and not in fear of punishment? Being forced into submission of these rules when one doesn't yet have the maturity (no one who's young does) to control his/her urges is dangerous. It only takes one out of touch with whom he/she truly is. Being allowed to fight those urges and entering into personal moral/value-system struggles in a hostile/apathetic environments will breed far more character and wisdom. Not to mention respect for those who choose different paths which I know a lot of fundies have. I dislike that very much.
Having guidelines is ok. Binding one's hands and feet, blinding him, and putting a duct tape over his mouth is NOT the solution.
Oy vai!
You crack me up when you type Yiddish phrases.
wit
6 Reprimands + $25 Fine
"Attendance at a dance"
18 Reprimands + $250 Fine
+ 18 hours Disciplinary Community Service
"Association with those consuming alcohol"
" Falsification of information on an official document"
They put BEING with someone drinking in the same category as forgery. Priorities are a wee bit fucked up.
30 Reprimands + $500 Fine
"Abortion"
"Possession or consumption of alcoholic beverages"
God forgive you if you have a beer, that's up there with abortion...
Liberty University isn't very liberal...