OK, Mine doesn't have a baseball bat, but he missed out on the purr REAL loud one inch from your ear trick! Also the cold nose on your arm trick! Mine doesn't want fed, she just wants to go to bed and I am laying in HER spot!
How do you know she doesn't have a baseball bat? Simon doesn't know his cat has a baseball bat.
Mainly because If she had one, I'd have been hit with it long ago!! She really gets upset when I sleep in! Once it is daylight she think the bed is hers!!
I love where he trying to knock the bird off the door and his mouth is open to catch said bird.
...and he points to his mouth. Love it. 
I <3 Simon's cat!
lamparty
Thank you! This is a good one!!