Apr 05, 09 06:47 am — What She Was Wearing
by Denver Butson
this is my suicide dress
she told him
I only wear it on days when Im afraid I might kill myself if I dont wear it
youve been wearing it every day since we met
he said
and these are my arson gloves
so you dont set fire to something?
he asked
exactly
and this is my terrorism lipstick
my assault and battery eyeliner
my armed robbery boots
Id like to undress you he said
but would that make me an accomplice?
and today she said Im wearing
my infidelity underwear
so dont get any ideas
and she put on her nervous breakdown hat and walked out the door
My favorite limerick.
Then I with my usual enthusiasm
admired my fiancee's bos-iasm
"They're small," I said, "Pat,"
Said she "Don't say that,
"You should see how my poor sister Suzy has 'em."
There was a lady photographer named Ambrosia
who was known for her lack of composure.
She went out of the house, in a see thru blouse
and was arrested for double exposure.
AHEM!
*Best Brooklyn Accent*
Little Miss Muffet Sat on Her Tuffet,
eatin her curds and way,
Along came a spider, who sat down beside her,
and said "Hey! What's In Da Bowl Bitch?
Sick
'I cannot go to school today, '
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
'I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more-that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut-my eyes are blue-
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke-
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is-what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is...Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play! '
Shel Silverstein
<3's
It is tough to decide, but this is one of me favorite Shel poems...
Boa Constrictor
Oh, I'm being eaten
By a boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor,
And I don't like it--one bit.
Well, what do you know?
It's nibblin' my toe.
Oh, gee,
It's up to my knee.
Oh my,
It's up to my thigh.
Oh, fiddle,
It's up to my middle.
Oh, heck,
It's up to my neck.
Oh, dread,
It's upmmmmmmmmmmffffffffff . . .
lolol
I loved his stuff when I was a kid. Still do. Sick completely reminds me of my little sister. 
My mom bought me every book he ever wrote at different times of my life and inscribed the front cover with mushy mom talk. Pretty cool on her part.
Maude_Lynne
The Wanton, though she knows its dangers,
Must needs smear Kohl about her eyes
And wake the interest of strangers
With long-drawn, hoarse, erotic sighs.
~Edward Gorey
(for you peeps that need your poetry rhymin'.)