Aug 09, 06 03:57 pm — Ok severeal minor rants that have been rattling in my head that i'd figure I'd share. Comment, sahre yours, have a fit and destroy your computer in anger that i dar post such concepts.
1) Someone needs to inform waitstaff everywhere not to ask essy questions while the customer is eating. I have food in my mouth, "Can I get you enaything?" can be answered with a nod or shake of the head we both continue about our business as pleasantly as posisble. You ask me "How is everything?" and stand around and wait, I have to rush my dining experience to get rid of you by answering your essay question or have to deal with you looming over my food.
2) People over 50 pissing and moaning about how single parents ruin America and produce nothing but ruined children. Grasp the irony that a) there are plenty of kids from single parent households that are just fine if not more than fine and b) your supposedly superior culture of the good old days and tradition produced said phenomina that is undermining the fabric of America. By your logic, your generation has something fundamentally flawed with it that produced people who couldn't respect radition and stay married like they shoul, so your just as screwed up as every single mom out there you piss and moan about.
3) Get off the phone, put down the ipod, stop doing your hair and drive. This involves the use of turn signals, mirrors, making sure your car is within your lane and other apparantly foreign concepts. Making sure your feet are not sticking out the window, and pulling over to eat lunch wouldn't be bad ideas either.
4) Reconsider the idea of going to the beach as a relaxing summery thing to do. Please. It's 6 hours in the car driving, another horu in thee car dealing with parking, and some relatively short ammount of time jammed in ass to elbow on a beach you have to pay for. It's not a good plan. If you still go, at least go in the frikin water, otherwise what's the point? You just spent the weekend in a giant traffic jam that smells like sweaty people cookign themselves in coconut oil and vehicle exhaust.
5) The obvious solution to record breaking state budget shortfalls is NOT to close half the hospitals in the state and impliment universal state funded health-care. It really isn't, trust me I have a pocket calculator and it backs me up that (2/2)-5 results in a negative number.
6) If you buy your kid a bratz doll, you forever lose the right to compalin about what your kid wears being too slutty. Sorry, you are an idiot, live with it quietly if at all possible, you'll seem smarter that way.
7) Celebrities are no different than you other than wealth and noteriety. Obsessing and fawning over their every action will get you neither and bring you no closer to them. Why the hell do you continue to do it and treat it like they matter? Spend some time reveiwing your life rather than theirs, it'll make a lot bigger difference.
8) if Your product so desperately needs a more robust, tamper-proof blister pack, perhaps it needs to be sold by some method other than hanging it off a peg in a blister pack.
9) Why can't they make a cellphone anymore that is actually a good phone rather than a half-assed camera/imclient/mp3 player/personal massager? You can add those things, but howabout it still does the phone thing decently?
10) why can't we have term limits for every single elected office. Please. Pretty please with sugar on top.
1) Or be honest and say the food is average at best and overpriced once you've tasted it.
2) I'm over 50 and its not the single moms, its the freeloading bums that piss me off.
3) And those in the SUV's: please take a look, some of us are down here in little cars, try not to run me over.
4) The beach is only 10 minutes from my house, the lake is nice and most of those on it make fine eye candy. But I still don't go there much.
5) Perhaps having some people who passed an accounting class as elected officials might help as well.
6) My daughter is 22, whew!
7) Magazines like People and shows like Entertainment Tonight should be outlawed. Why do we treat asshole ego freaks like royalty?
8) What happened to the paper bag?
9) Why do we even need to talk on a phone this much?
10) Longer terms mean deeper pockets for lobbyists to fill. This fall fire 'em all, re-elect nobody!
Crap! I just had my name legally changed to Nobody.
You'll always be somebody to me.
11) Pretentious, bitchy blogs listing reasons the author doesn't like certain things should be bannished from the web, forever.
Hey, i never said that these applied to everyone or that I was actually right about any of them.
Just needed a place to bitch briefly about things of relatively minor consequence in the grand scheme of things.
Half the point was to get some perspective as I have been pretty stressed lately.
So yeah, it's bitchy, but it isn't meant to be pretentious.
raz, chill out, you could make exactly the same comeback to his comment that he made to yours, namely, that it is a pain in the ass when someone takes an attitude toward a blog that no one forced him to read in the first place.
It's all fine, I'm not pissed.
I'm bitchin all in good fun. It's perfectly ok to come back and say quit yer bitchin'.
One thing that has been on my mind are people that put "RIP Whoever 1970-2006". I see these all the time around me. I don't know who that person was, nor do I really care, as we all lose people around us.
Stop hanging out in cemeteries then. 
There is one right down the street from my house. It is one of the really old ones that always seems to have that fog hanging around it. Kinda creepy.
Careful there, never know who you may run in to.
Another couple things I thought of:
1) I know I live in Florida, and only 20 miles from the beach, but why do so many people wear flip-flops everywhere? I really don't like toes that much to have to stare at the nasty, hairy, hangnailed toes that I see on a daily basis.
2) Girls that wear PJ bottoms out in public. No one thinks you are sexy, just lazy (same goes for people wearing slippers in public).
7) Celebrities are no different than you other than wealth and noteriety. Obsessing and fawning over their every action will get you neither and bring you no closer to them. Why the hell do you continue to do it and treat it like they matter? Spend some time reveiwing your life rather than theirs, it'll make a lot bigger difference.
I've had an idea swimming around my head for awhile about this: a magazine about normal people with headlines about Larry the neighborhood watch guy getting caught picking his nose and about what's going to happen to the old lady who waters her lawn on everyday when (because of "water restrictions") she is only supposed to sprikling her alwn on Mon, Wed, and Sat.
[Comment was edited by Joe Cool on August 13, 2006 at 03:58:57 PM]
Gramps
I gotta admit that I am pretty much in agreement with you, with a little bit of nitpicking.
I want to agree with the term limit thing, but you gotta figure that it takes an elected office holder a bit of time to get up to speed once taking office, and once fully functional, we shouldn't just automatically bounce their asses out of office until we can get some competent work out of them. So I say okay to term limits, but they can't be too short.
I happen to be over 50, grew up in a two parent family, and my kids also grew up in a two parent family. You will never, and I mean NEVER hear me talk the way you mentioned above, for the simple reason that I don't feel the slightest bit superior to other parents, except for the obvious ones that kill, maim, or massively abuse their kids. I think there has got to be something wrong with ANYONE who tsk-tsks ANY other parenting style or even any other parent (except the usual abusers I listed). Parenting is a serious 24/7 two dozen year committment and no one gets out of that kind of responsibility without screwing up some. The only expression comes to mind;
"He who is without sin cast the first stone"
(I sure as hell wouldn't, even though my kids are perfectly fine adults now)
I use my cell phone a lot in the car, but I use a bluetooth and I drive carefully. I put 25,000 miles or more on a car, and have done so for nearly 30 years without serious accidents, most of which involved someone running into me while I was stopped at a red light. That said, I know what you mean; at least once a day I find myself side by side with another car to the right of me, the driver bissfully unaware that the lane he/she is in ends about 20 feet in front of them because they are on the phone, not watching the road. I go to the trouble of switching lanes myself, so that they don't run into my ass in a panic when the road ends in front of them.