Oct 07, 04 05:39 am — It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff.
As Claude took to the stage, he announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."
The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations."
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting
"Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch...."
The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light
gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the
swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and
fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.
"Shit" said the hypnotist.
It took three weeks to clean up the theatre.
*cricket noises* * cricket noises*
But seriously, folks.
I am going to go out on a limb here and guess that you are telling mild jokes as a way of protesting the red-lettered warnings about offensive submissions. Is that right?
Maybe... but most probably not, Newfie is well known for his lame joke of the day journals.
Yes he is! I tried my hand at it and failed miserably. His jokes are far lamer than mine!
That joke wasn't as lame as his previous ones.
I find that insulting and I formely request an apology.
I'm so very sorry that your joke of the day journals are so lame 
What does tumbleweed sound like?
I get tumble weeds out here. They start out as those god damned thorny "puncture weeds" that flattened my bicycle tires as a kid.
They don't make much noise.
I think his jokes are pretty awesome. True, they can be cheesy, but those are my favorites. This one in particular was awesome.
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